Awards We'd Like to See

This time of year, our email inboxes tend to get bombarded with “Super Lawyer,” “Top Lawyer,” “Best Lawyer,” lists and other awards. But where are the awards we really want to see? You know what I’m talking about—awards that recognize some of the legal system’s odder moments.

Let’s start with an easy one—“Most Fitting Name for a Criminal Defendant.” When a 34 year-old St. Petersburg, Florida, woman named Kanisha allegedly sped through two red lights before slamming into a Taco Bell sign and driving off in June, local police might be understandably suspicious about whether the driver had been drinking. Sure enough, when an officer confronted the driver, she was allegedly “wobbly” with “bloodshot, watery eyes,” and the “odor of an alcoholic beverage on her breath.” Accordingly, Kanisha was charged with driving under the influence, leaving the scene of an accident, and driving with a suspended or revoked license (she had seven prior convictions for driving without a license). But the best part of this case is the alleged drunken driver’s last name: Booze.